The Babylon Bee Did It!

INDIAN TRAIL, NC—An anonymous local man—who goes by the name “Andy Hopkins”— who has recently come out as a blogger decided to take an early risk in his young writing career by writing a satire piece late in the day on Friday. With a hopeful smile on his face and a funny thought in his brain, he began furiously typing as a friend watched.

The exceptionally unknown blogger—who we’ll call “Andy” from now on, for no particular reason—had an idea to write a funny fake article about a self-refuting man who is absolutely sure there is no such thing as absolute truth.

Much to his chagrin, Andy’s very imaginary friend—with whom he carries on very real conversations—bounced up and down like a rabid kangaroo rat taunting, “The Babylon Bee did it! The Babylon Bee did it!”

It turns out that the beloved website trusted for “Christian news satire”—The Babylon Bee—had already written this very piece. In fact, every conceivable fake story from the time God created Adam to Jesus’ second coming has been or will be written by the Bee.

Andy, himself a devout worshiper of the Bee—feeling quite undeterred—gave the following quote to no one particular:

“Imitation is the sincerest form of praise, right? Besides, what if there are people who don’t have access to ‘The Bee’ but do have access to me? I may be the only image bearer of ‘The Bee’ to bring its good news to all those people!”

Christian brand makers everywhere pondered the idea of creating “What Would The Babylon Bee Do?” bumper stickers, wristbands and other paraphernalia—but thought better of it when reminded of the first of the Ten Commandments.

In the end, Andy wrote his first satirical article anyway.